Now isn't that a title that J K Rowling would be proud of?
Pete Aldin see where you've taken me? (No not turning into JKR - I wish) Or maybe it's just I've been reading Harry and The Half-Blood Prince, with my venture into Deathly Hallows just ahead of me!
But let's not diverge!
So it is with great pleasure I share with you my Best of ... series, where I present 10 of my earlier posts that best sum up what Pink Apple is about.
That was actually quite challenging because that old Self-Doubt Demon (I really must come up with a name for it!) was doing its best to convince me I wouldn't find any! But, in fact, while time-consuming, I was quite surprised with what I found in the archives that I can summon pride in again sharing with you!
If you're a regular reader, you've probably worked out I have lots of interests
- supporting and nurturing women,
- staying sane at Christmas
- small business,
- books and reading, and
But my BHAG (Big Hairy Audacious Goal) is to help couples discover the many and endless moments of joy in their relationships. I'm doing that by sharing the Secrets of Successful Relationships.
So the articles that best sum up Pink Apple fall under that category.
Here are links to 10 of my favourites. They're in no particular order, except occasionally chronological!
It's very tempting when we're angry with someone, be it our partner, colleague, or the Indonesian government, to avoid letting all our peripheral or past judgments, come into the debate. [more]
Isolation and alienation is a big part of the bully's toolkit. Unfortunately, psychological bullying is more likely to be the domain of women. Women's skills with relationship-building have a flipside in the female bully's capacity to alienate. Other tactics might include: [more]
Firstly, they point out what listening is NOT. Guys, I think you might sigh with relief as you read these! [more]
Little does she know, as she rests in the dewy-eyed wonder of her new marriage, that disillusionment is ahead. How will she manage when the sheen rubs off the relationship? [more]
Because one of the perennial problems that couples find most hard to get over, is the issue of the sharing of chores! On the surface, it would seem a simple enough problem to solve.
But it's like a wartime ocean, filled with depth charges and silent, drifting bombs just waiting to explode! [more]
As Doug reminds us, just because you find your soulmate, doesn't mean you can take the foot off the pedal, in terms of your efforts and input into nurturing the relationship. "The great danger of the soulmate myth is the accompanying belief that the relationship will be easy over time. Relationships decay when someone puts their feet up." [more]
We can also confuse our LOVERS with our language! And I don't mean abusive language; or even "talking dirty", for the more risque of my readers!
"I just feel so distanced from him. It feels like he's pushing me away"
This client "hears" love in the language of positive affirmations. If her partner criticises her, then, no matter how lovingly the criticism is delivered, she's likely to read that criticism as rejection, and even evidence of loathing. [more]
Now, I dare any of you to tell me you've got the perfect partner! I even dare any of you to tell me you've got the worst partner in the world! There's no such thing! All there is, is "good enough" or "bad enough" to prompt us to make choices. [more]
As I listen to some of my clients, I am sad to hear them relate stories of failing to restrain themselves when it might have helped.
When the fight is on, and it's far from fair, (and in fact downright dirty), THAT'S the time for restraint. [more]
One of the key secrets to successful relationships is a simple value that our Mums and Dads probably taught us - Respect and Goodwill.
What turns that head-over-heels love into a belief that Your Adored One is always "out to get you"? What would make you think that a nasty attack is the best form of defence? Where has that mean spirit come from and how long do you want to live with it?
For some reason slowly and painfully respect and goodwill have leaked out of the "lovin' feeling" [more]