As some of you would know, I am a regular contributor of relationship advice to The Calm Space, an online magazine that is like "a virtual day-spa for the senses".
This month's theme on The Calm Space is Power and Strength.
In the Relationship Space, (my little corner of The Calm Space world) this month I've been raising awareness of the power women have over the frequency of a couple's sexual activity.
Because, in a non-abusive relationship if the woman says no she doesn’t want to have sex, then the couple don’t have sex. He might try wheedling, tickling, kissing, whispering endearments, or a hundred other possibilities. But if it’s no, then it’s no go! [more]
When I consider this power, I'm reminded of the kid who used to take control of the garden tap when we were all playing under the sprinklers of our childhood.
Did you have a big brother/sister or some neighbourhood kid who ran to the tap and took control of the flow of water? Turning it up high so that it sprayed well away from where you stood waiting for that wave of cool relief. Or turning it off, and torturing you with their unrelenting grip on the tap – despite all your pleas and angry screams? [more]
And I'm not necessarily suggesting that this power is only about limiting the number of encounters, plenty of women have high libidos which are stronger that their partner's. But the same issue remains, the power to be the one in control of "the tap", deciding when it will be turned on and off, is a power to be used like a benevolent dictator as commenter Angela Esnouf shares. It needs to be used wisely and well.
So I left my readers on The Calm Space with some questions, why not go over and have alook at them? Maybe you've got something to contribute to the conversation that's started over there.
Who took our delightfully reminiscent photo?
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